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Wet Noodle Posse | Blog

Friday, June 16, 2006

Dragon Speak by Sandy Blair

Last Christmas, Scott gave me Dragon Naturally Speaking soft wear. (He thought if I could write faster, he could retire all the sooner. Ha!) Thinking I might as well give it a whirl as I start my new manuscript, I hooked up the head set and software. I did the tutorial so the computer would recognize my voice, the way I phrased things. I then studied the Quick Reference Card. With all systems go, I open the document and set my font, etc. I’m ready!
Me: “Capital--Please—comma--I beg ye—comma—Cameron—comma--dinna go--exclamation point.”
Dragon types: “Capital peas common I bag yeast common camera on common dinner go!”
Me: “Ugh!”
Dragon: ought
Me: “Cr*p.”
Dragon: crap
Ah, it can’t understand me worth a damn, but it can curse. Great. This time--with teeth clenched--I backspace and try again only to get the same results, so I type in what I want. To myself, I mutter, “Let’s try this again, shall we?”
Dragon: “Lettuce tie this again shall we”
I count to ten, backspace, and check the quick reference card. “CAPITAL--Her son put down the wet stone and claymore--period.”
Dragon: “Capital her sun put down the wet stone and clay more period”
Me: “Ughhhhh!”
Dragon: ahaahah
Laugh at me, will you! I jerked the headset cord out of the computer and start to type. Scott’s just going to have to come up with an alternative retirement plan.

9 Comments:

At 11:35 AM, Blogger MaryF said...

Hilarious, Sandy!!!! I've been tempted myself, but that sounds way complicated!

 
At 12:51 PM, Blogger Prisakiss said...

Sandy, your blog is hilarious! Me, being the computer loser that I am, can totally identify with your frustration. Pity for Scott's retirement plans. :-)

Best of luck with your new manuscript. If your other books are anything to go by, this new one will be a gem!

 
At 9:47 PM, Blogger bridget said...

Bwahaha! If it will get me to find out what happens in the saga sooner, I might agree to type as you dictate =) I can even spell claymore.

 
At 10:22 PM, Blogger Tori Scott said...

OMG. I'm sorry, Sandy, but I'm ROTFLMAO. I can just picture it.

Poor Scott.

 
At 10:29 PM, Blogger Trish Milburn said...

LOL! What a hoot. I've heard that this program is really hard to train.

 
At 9:07 AM, Blogger Sandy Blair said...

Worse, the software was expensive, so I feel quilty not using it. Worst still, every time Scott asks how it's going I feel compelled to say, "Great, honey. Love it." Ack!

 
At 8:14 AM, Blogger Norah said...

I'm sorry, Sandy, I know the software was expensive, but this just cracked me up!
Norah

 
At 12:03 PM, Blogger Kiki, aka Esri said...

That's the exact experience I had, the many years ago I tried it. I think Delle uses it pretty successfully. Maybe we have funny voices. ;)

 
At 9:16 PM, Anonymous Phyllis Middleton said...

Hi Sandy,
Phyllis M here. I got two different versions - Dragon Speak and another. Had the same thing happen. I also found it takes shorter time to type . than to say it.
Huh, who knew?
Love ya girl!
Phyllis

 

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